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So, I turned 30 pretty recently, and to be perfectly honest, I’m pretty under whelmed with the whole experience. Nevertheless, I suppose I’ll mark this somewhat arbitrarily-defined chronological milestone with a return to blogging- this time in the form of a good ol’ fashioned preachy list of collected wisdom I attained throughout my twenties that I, in turn, wish to impart on my younger friends.
I will preface this list by stating that, although I believe my life to be pretty awesome (I play music for a living and usually get to sleep in! I get fan mail from Malaysia!), I’m in truth just as dysfunctional as everyone else and not really qualified to give advice. However, the extreme highs and lows of my early adulthood have been replaced with a more even-keeled emotional outlook now that I’m on the “greyer” side of my twenties, and I like to believe this comes as a result of understanding, rather than apathy.
So, here‘s what I’ve got, youngsters:
-Very few decisions you make are truly irrevocable. Learn what those are, and handle with care. For everything else, spend less time theorizing and more time acting.
-Humans aren’t inherently “good” or “bad”; they’re just human. Avoid such dichotomous thinking and focus on motivations instead.
-All of us are unique, which means that none of us are all that special (this applies to us narcissistic musicians, too).
-You are going to make tons of mistakes in your life. Better to get them out of the way sooner, rather than later. Make friends with failure and don’t take yourself too seriously.
-Take responsibility for everything you do; it’s the only way to maintain some semblance of control over your life. Plus, it’ll make you more likable in general.
-Don’t bother trying to emulate anyone, because chances are they’re just as confused as you. Cut out the middle man and aim to become your own role model instead.
-We are all saddled with an incredible amount of bias, despite our best efforts to remain
impartial. Always open yourself to the possibility that you are completely wrong.
-All that stuff your parents told you about hard work and character? It’s true. Deal with it.
-A simple, genuine apology can mend conflicts almost instantly. It’s hard to fathom why they are so often viewed as last resorts.
-The lives of others are not nearly as exciting as they outwardly appear. Don’t waste your time comparing yourself with anyone.
-Our minds are expert deceivers. Expect to remember most things to be better than they were, and understand that it’s only an illusion.
-There is nothing quite like an honest compliment. Give them freely, without trepidation, and you’ll feel much better about life in general. Yeah- I hate that new age hippie s***, too, but it’s true.
-Just because something makes logical sense does not make it correct. We’re designed to seek out patterns, even when none exist.
-Take everything that the media reports with a grain of salt- it’s only fair, since they infuse most stories with little more than a grain of context. Remember- their job is to sell advertising.
-All political parties are flawed. Sociopolitical and economic issues have very deep roots, and cannot be resolved in nice, tidy doctrines.
-If you are presented with a great opportunity, take it–even if you aren’t fully prepared. No one is EVER fully prepared.
-Don’t be too hard on yourself. There’s a fine line between self-discipline and self-loathing, and nothing’s worth crossing that line.
-If, as you get older, you find yourself with less answers and more questions, don’t worry- that means you’re doing it right.
-The primary function of education is to produce good citizens.
-There’s little reason to concern yourself with how you are viewed by others. Most people are too preoccupied with how they themselves appear to others to truly care.
-Circumstances are rarely as dire as they appear.
-Solutions are rarely as simple as they appear.
-Our brains are quantum computers; therefore, it’s perfectly acceptable to feel contradictory emotions simultaneously. Similarly, it’s perfectly normal to feel very old and very young at the same time.
-Cultivate a healthy distrust of authority and you will find it much easier to assert yourself in critical situations.
-When people do cruel things, their intentions are not “evil,” per se; rather, they find some oblique way of rationalizing such acts as deserved. Remember- everyone is their own protagonist.
-Giving “because that’s what you’re supposed to do” as an explanation is a horrible way to inspire others to do anything, but a surprisingly effective way to inspire yourself to action.
-If you haven’t failed at something repeatedly, you probably aren’t any good at it. Success comes in leaps and bounds, but only after an initial period of screwing everything up.
-Don’t be a people pleaser. It’s disingenuous, and will make others resent you in time. Accept that you won’t be liked by some, and that’s ok.
-You need not have much in common with your friends. You should enjoy their company, however.
-Lists like this are of little practical use, since experience is the only teacher. But, it’s fun to pretend to be a wise old sage every now and again. GET OFF MY LAWN.
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Free Mp3 Available at: http://www.facebook.com/scottbradleemusic
On the last day of my twenties, I returned to my childhood home with a truck, a small generator, a video producer, a sound engineer, and 16 musicians to create a one-take “street musician symphony,” as seen from a moving vehicle. Everything you see and hear was recorded live in one continuous shot, thanks to Stephen Kellner and Justin Holt of Aphelion Entertainment.
The song is John Lennon’s “Imagine,” sung by my good friend Niia- check her music out here: http://www.facebook.com/pages/Niia/205253849525127
